Question for you. Are boobs and hands polarly charged, thus causing the inevitable joining of the two. If so are some breasts simply charged backwards
so... my grandma just told me i should be a stripper
well at least shes not calling you fat anymore
if i remember New Year's Eve then there is something seriously wrong.
I just saw him at the bookstore and all I could think about was him licking your ass
It's like my work doesn't even care about margarita mondays.
Don't worry. I told him just because you've gargled some balls in the past doesn't mean you'll be handling his.
I really wanted that to be shared. Thank you.
Pot head idea of the day: make a maraca out of weed seeds. Or a rain stick? Definitely rain stick.
It's been hot as balls outside. It's like getting tea bagged by the Sun.
This family outing has commenced with me throwing up in an apple orchard
You were doing bacon vodka shots and chasing them with barbecue sauce. You're officially fucking disgusting. I love you.
I swear to god....if you can give yourself a brazilian you can take a fucking bullet
I am having telepathic thoughts with my cat. He loves me and wants me to blow his nose
Brah, we should get a "do not disturb sign"... I can't have people knocking on the door while I'm high, it fucks with me way too much.
After we finished, she peed a little on my chest and told me she was "marking her territory". I didn't know if I should have been scared or aroused.
WHY CANT I FIND JUST A NORMAL DISNEY LOVING MAN TO PAINT WITH ALL THE COLORS OF THE WIND WITH!!
Randomize
