Puking blue powerade in mcdonalds parking lot to the applause of the guy taking out the trash with man in the mirror blasting in the background. Good morning stl
i just defriended some girl because according to her status she "doesn't give a fuck about shark week."
i just keep taking vicodin and supergluing random shit
I find it ironic that im starting my birth control on mothers day.
I was just "that girl you seen blowing some dude outside when you drove by"
No. Mother. Fucking. Jello shots. Just no. I'm not falling into that trap again.
This is actually a pretty big deal for him. I mean, he contacted a stranger out of concern for someone else instead of for sex.
That does show growth.
Dunno why I keep hitting snooze. It's never gonna give me the kind of sleep I need to be sober.
Yeah. It's just like I have his virginity and he has my shoes and where do we go from here.
I'm sorry you caught us fucking in your bathroom. If it makes you feel any better when I tried to put my pants back on I dropped them in the toilet.
i love it when bitches who pick on you in high school get fat. thank you facebook you have made my day.
TRY TO UNDERSTAND I HAVE MAGIC POWERS HOLY FUCKING SHIT
Yeaaaaa...im super disgusted with myself lol...which is interesting, considering all of the things I have done in my life...
i just sneezed the second i jizzed and it got in my eye. words can't describe how much i hate life right now.
So were driving two hours to go to a club and Charles packed me a sippy cup full of tequila. He thinks of everything!
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