Thats not how I planned it, its just the way she passed out
I love hooters. This dumb bartender is saying how coffee dehydrates you so that's why she sometimes just eats the coffee grinds wake up.
you ate skittles off the table like a hungry hungry hippo. it was awesome.
Well, if your day started with strippers, then we're tied. Otheriwse, I'm winning.
Just found out that wake n bake is not one of the 7 habits of highly effective people..
It's 10am. I'm hungover wearing a flyers jersey and a phillies hat and eating a cheesesteak. I'm not the only one. Best city ever.
You took a bar mat shot.
I don't care how fucking drunk you are, you don't forget wanting to shove a wine bottle up someone's ass.
Because it was 5am and I had a shitty mixed drink and I was threatening to put my balls in your face.
Not the worst first impression I've experienced.
That guy has been pretty randomly in and out of my vagina for 4 years...I don't think I'm required to tell him when I'm dating.
Good point.
I fucked him on my yoga mat. Then we wake and baked and ate granola. So yes, you could say I found my center.
We had sex in his hot tub. Then we saved a mouse that almost drown in his pool. We celebrated our heroism with more sex.
I'm only fucking women born in the 90s this summer
I can't base my relationships off of good dick and dogs.
You kept apologizing to your car for talking behind its back
Randomize
