You told her the u were going to wrap your dick around her neck and start her like a lawn mower. thats why she left.
she said it was okay because they were "professional" nude pictures of her on the internet
you mean i was at the winter classic?
I wish i could be on x for the rest of my life.
Who the fuck was that guy he kept pulling his dick out walking up to people trying to hand it to people and saying go ahead open the door like it was a door knob
One my way home. There was too much fog, strobe lights, and cocaine for my taste.
Why we can't turn this into a healthy friendship where I cheat on my boyfriend with you and you feel better knowing everything wrong with my life is beyond me.
I'm using the bullet from my cock ring to massage out my tmj lock jaw from giving too much head.
It's that moment where you find out the girl you've been dating for 6 months is a mob daughter. Post breakup.
Robert just walked in drunk, grabbed my Jameson from me, told me to let him do his thing, and spilled it all over the coffee table. Then he told me to grab a funnel because he was going home.
jen just told me ur idea of revenge was saluting while letting his bong float away while attached to some balloons.
I now have a bottom rung on my kissing scale. Like I can say "Well. On a scale of Matt to Braxton he was probably a Zach." It's the little things.
So I just realized I have three bananas, seven condoms, three lube packets, three tampons, and a shot glass in my bag but no pen #modelstudent
She rode me like a jockey on that tiny couch. Then we spooned.
Just made a secret hand shake with my sisters cat. Boredom at its finest.
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