Semi hypothetical question. Do you think its physically possible to bruise your clit?
Just got a birthday card from Camel. How am I supposed to stop smoking when they care?
i gave her a can of corn and told her the cabs are accepting non perishable food items over the holidays. blatant lie and she lives like $40 away
EVERYONE CAN HEAR YOU FUCKING YOU ARE IN A TENT
I can't relate, I like my boobs roaming free like a wild animal, and I occasionally let them devour small children
It's called the dick transitive property. It states if you touch a person whilst they touch a dick, you are also touching said dick.
I probably should have eaten more before I started shotgunning beers at 9am, but it was so much damn fun.
You kidnapped her dog. I don't care that you and the dog are epic bros, that's just not cool. Return him.
OMG he dropped his pants for me. Granted it was to show me where he got stabbed but still...
I expect you will be there for a drunken 3way with my husband again this new year.
I have a hickey in my new work ID photo.....
His penis is the only thing worth pursuing but all the baggage attached isn't.
...this is why fuck buddies should be only for grownups.
I'm wearing jeans from 7th grade and drinking a fucking macchiato. This better be a good day.
I think i got beer on your cat.
Randomize
