look to my right... shes dancing like she's playing dance dance revolution and her character is a retarded, drunken moose
she doesn't hate you. She just thinks you need a personality adjustment, speech therapy and weight watchers.
do people in england often walk their sheep on leashes? or is this guy the exception to the rule?
Dude, I had to masturbate just to stay warm. Please pay the gas bill?
Pretty sure I just shit out pure stomach acid. I'll explain after you take me to a hospital
I just witnessed my first non cocain induced sunrise in five years.
Not my cup of tea
I'm expecting you to come by soon and a magical night of sex and floating on clouds to follow.
There is booty call etiquette, and he just isn't following it. I'm not making you breakfast, gtfo.
Is it bad that I'm a 32 year old woman that is so afraid of commitment that a hamster is too much responsibility?
My goal is to be drunk before we even get out of the No Wake Zone.
Whoever was doing lines off my iPad is a dick. Also bring Gatorade, for I hunger
For Who flesh?
I can't. I mean he's hot, but there's really nothing else there
You just said he's hot
NO YOU DON'T UNDERSTAND
I don't know. Seeing the vagina stretched out beyond normal proportions is like watching your favorite superhero die.
GOD DAMN IT I COULD HAVE HAD A MOTHERFUCKING 3 WAY LAST NIGHT. WHY BOOZE, WHY?!
also, i'm not sure if i'm proud to say this but our regional manager's hot fiance was grinding on me at the reception while he stood and watched.
i suppose that explains why he told me he plans on promoting you this Friday.
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