yo my bday is less then one week away. hope youve found another annoying candian i can lick dairy products off of. also sorry about your loss
I swear ... this hickey is a map to Amelia Earhart's whereabouts
Just burped. Tasted like beer and cherios...Beerios. This is gonna be quite a day.
I faked it too. I just spit on your bed.
you're acting like its my fault you're allergic to sperm or something.
i told you we never speak of that again
At 4am he sent "uree asss ize anmazin"
everyone at work keeps looking at me like they know I got the herp this weekend
So how many licks to the face does it take to get kicked out of the bar?
Beer vodka and pink lemonade powder mixed together. So. Many. Penises. My vagina will be calling out to them tonight. Coooooooooooooome.
Water park on acid. THIS NEEDS TO HAPPEN!!
We HAVE another bedroom, it's not like I was gunna chain you into the closet. Often.
BUT I think maybe Thursday in celebration of America we should probably tan and see how fast we can finish everything in the liquor cabinet.
Yeah yeah, I don't care. I bought a super soaker, so lets please go attracting attention by spraying each other while wearing white tank tops?
Im just an angry damaged little elf who wanders around and tries to find drugs.
Dude, Kevin called the cops on the cops.
Randomize
