I want your puppy
I meant pussy
I would rather you take my puppy
an ex called crying about her current BF. convo ended in phone sex. i love emotional wrecks
Right now im sitting at home and all i can think about is im eating calories and i should be out drinking them.
They are making fun of natty and blackberries.
Tell them they are ugly.
Preparing for wine wednesday. How would you feel about improvising and starting a white russian wednesday tomorrow instead? you know, shake things up a bit.
He was like an artic tracker. Walked ten paces from the tree, then 15 paces from the mailbox, dug down in the snow, and pulled up the case of beer he hid from his parents out there. It tasted like ice cold success.
I heard that clinking noise from behind me and I already knew you were whipping out a Smirnoff in class. Again.
Sometimes turtles just really trip me out man
I told my grandmother all I want is a nice guy who likes to be tied up.
I woke wondering who the hell was in my bed. Then i felt boobs and remembered Haha. Thirsty Thursday killed my liver and my homosexuality
Yeah I mean once a gun is being waved around, its probably a good time to leave the party
But the music was sooo good
Just want to let you know thanks for setting the bar pretty low when it comes to girls.
would it be okay if I showed up at your house naked? and is your door unlocked?
When i said you could use my car and have sex in the back....i wasn't being serious.
Be there in 20. Want icecream?
sex. I want sex. I like where your heads at though.
Randomize
