how was that guy you hooked up with?
i used to think blowing a .05 was a good thing
made out with the bouncer to distract him from how illegitimate my fake id is.
Trying to find something to do here is like trying to find a vegan resturant in alabama.
i wish there was a 'silent except for booty calls' volume level on my phone
17 year olds will be the death of me.
Why's my alcoholism being used to prove a point?
Bad news is he broke up with me via text message
But the good news is I've returned as mayor of whoreville
The "puke-towel" started to grow something...
You may or may not of thrown up on your shoes, and you tried to give me a wet willy in my eye.
Dude when we asked him where he lived all he could tell us was "by the slurpees." That fucked up.
I'm just gonna stay I'm bed where it is warm and cozy and nobody knows me as the girl that puked on a stripper
Ideas I've had tonight: An entire movie based off the Pixar lamp jumping on stuff.
If it wasn't for the fact that I drink during my lunch break I'm pretty sure I would have quit this job by now
I just did a booty-call caliber shave job in preparation for this weekend. Fuck being ladylike; I'm tryna get LAID-ylike
thank god my bra was in my purse... were all good
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