No better way to find a friend than to offer cyber sex and see what happens
i couldnt tell she was wearing a bumpit until she started giving me head
it was like he was trying to blow his nose in my vagina
Just found out my mom's voicemail password is 6969..
if you really think there are plastic pots safe for the stove i fear for your future landlords.
So I'm looking through your google history on your laptop and you have 'is ketchup even remotely nutritious' and 'alcohol with fewest calories but highest alcohol'. What new fad diet are you on because I feel like we could do this together.
Please tell me you're throwing the cats into this foot of snow.
Uhh, there's a legit bruise on my boob.. Again how does he manage this
On a lighter note, my mom and I were playing scattergories, and for "things that you keep hidden" we both put dildo. Proof that we really are related.
I think shooting the BMW with the bow and arrow is when our group became the evening's antagonist
I had sex with a Dutch boy on a rock last night. Happy graduation! x x
remember how i yelled at you for inviting that coke dealer to the party?! i found the $100 bill they were snorting with in the couch.
..new slutty dresses or booze? i won't even waste time with the i told you so.
The problem with drugs is that there's none in this hotel
The problem with drugs is that showing my boobs only gets so much of them
MY TITS ARE PERFECTLY CALM.
Full body rubs, head scratches, foot rubs, massages, a penis that is able to get hard whenever you want it. I mean ive got a lot to offer
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