somehow, due in part to drug cocktail and alchl prior to meeting, i blacked out, got home, made total mess of kitchen, broke shower, and made 17 hard boiled eggs
party was madd awkward.. it was like every person who i sat next to in high school and never said hi to was there
She's like the female version of the Momento guy. She keeps forgetting that I'm an asshole after we have sex.
Lol i'z typing this with my 962 nose
962=my?
Yeah.i
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I hate the awkward morning-after-I-took-your-virginity conversations.
I'm at the cafe. It's 7am. There is a girl I don't know on my futon who tried to tickle me this morning when I got down from my loft. I also not wearing any underwear.
Talking to a male stripper. About the LSAT. Only in Vegas.
I can promise you that this new years eve will rival the one from senior year when we got that exchange student deported.
She actually was beyond drunk but she for some reason kept calling herself a demigod and made me drive her to a bookstore
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Why did you make me get in the car with you and then not give me a ride? I woke up in a bar with a blanket on me.
I was like kind of drunk but mostly just very enthusiastic about beyonce
I spent two entire hours explaining to a guy why I wouldn't make out with him. How was your night?
Already doing pt exercises by picking my margarita up off the night stand. Fuck yeah.
not even sure this counts as hungover but like my body can't exist in reality today
The sex would be better if it wasn’t interrupted because his home detention ankle monitor needed charging. At least I know he’s not cheating on me
Do you even hear yourself?
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