I play with my boobs when I'm bored. I playwith my nipples whe I'm drunk
All I remember from last night is puking up a box of cheeze-its and the building catching on fire.
Even the bartender felt bad for me
Now he's talking about how he's writing in a journal because he doesn't remember "his thought patterns when he was in elementary and that's distressing". I'm walking home. Fuck this.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
judging by the mobile uploads you added of me last night, we cant keep living this way.
I think i smell like relationship. That's my problem.
You found me in the back room alone eating someone else's whole birthday cake with my hands then asked me if you could join.
Hahaha my philosophy professor just opened class with "I had a shitty weekend and I was at the bar until 815 this morning. So bear with me".
She took the fish and put it in the hot tub, then turned on the jets. She said she was training it for the Olympics.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Whenever I'm hungover I try to stay in public as much as possible, hoping to be a cautionary tale to children. It's a public service, really.
He walked into the bar with a pillow and put his head down...nuff said
Now I’m honestly wondering if I took this kids virginity
Sometimes I look at dogs and just thing about how it's weird we both came from wolves
Lay off the drugs kid
He started me on Celexa. I think I feel like Bjork. Is that normal?
Like... my feet feel like little octopuses, and they want to swim to the next room.
Honestly, I am sitting in my room watching Ciara videos and thinking I am super jealous of how she rides it.
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