whatcha mean you cant get rid of genital warts? thats not what my girlfriend says
I consider it a successful poop when you only have to wipe once.
Day two of taking my adderall. I just organized the pantry and alphabetized my dvds. I've missed my mind on drugs
i just realized i put more money and effort into 420 then i did for christmas
This is a drunk text message. I am so glad that we are friends. Tomorrow we will eat sandwiches in miniature. We both love dogs. Flower.
We listened to Rod Stewart Pandora and slow danced in the shower.
I feel like having peed on eachother is a point in our lives we should never have gotten to...
Walk of shame: Easter Edition. He is risen.
then she lifted her dress, tweaked her own nipples, and then ordered another round for everyone. this place is wild at 9pm.
Whiskey and tits go great with anything. Especially fire.
You're the best friend ever. I wouldn't want to do the walk of shame with anyone else.
I'm like a sensual ninja. You turn your head for a second and.... BOOM I'm naked. It's like a naughty magic trick.
I'm glad you threw up in my bed because now we talk.
You waddled all the way home with your shoes in a construction cone. I'm glad to call you my Bestfriend.
Give me the sexing that I truly desire and I will reveal to you the mysterious location of the PBR's
Randomize
