OMFG BINX FROM HOCUS POCUS IS MCGEE IN NCIS!!!!!!!! most. epic. realization. ever.
the date was going great.. until he pulled down his pants and asked if there was any hair in between his cheeks.
The words "my birth control fell out" should never be spoken
She clogged the toilet and got it out with a seven eleven bag. I tried to tell her no but she was convinced that was the logical thing to do.
Jerry just sent me this: IOR GHIT ALL THE BUTTIB. Go get him. Now.
After 12 shots he decided to show us knife tricks. You can figure out how it ended
She's trying to feed the TV fried rice and screaming "FRIED RICE AND TEARS". Please bring me more booze.
Bright side: maybe hell start being nice to you now that you know he has erectile dysfunction.
Pretty sure that's a used tampon hanging from the tree outside my window.
Well his ex just grabbed his dick and told him yep Ill call u later
I'm drunk, I'm covered in pizza, and I'm watching Jurassic Park. I feel like you'll get this. xx
Can't decide if this guy is hot or if I'm just bored.
Sex is clearly the solution either way.
Thanks again for the coffee and orgasms
Add tweezing eyebrows to the list of things not to do while on adderol....
Right after i got done cumming i sat back and gave a big Ric Flair "WOOOOOO!"
Randomize
