Richard, I just read on your Twitter account that you have enjoyed a, "Much needed post birthday smoothie..."...A bit revealing, no?
My favorite part of our friendship is your tits.
I'm drunk and I'm watching it's Alwyas Sunny and eating candy. Even I am jealosu of my life
I don't care if you go out, because at the end of the night I know i'll be the one fucking you.
that was completely unnecessary, true, but unnecessary
We had sex on the hood of my car and broke the windshield.
In need of cum proof mascara. Don't judge me.
oh no, don't get me wrong.. she IS really pretty. If you are in to horses or Sarah Jessica Parker.
There is a hole in her door about 2 inch in diameter. You may see me on YouPorn
If you want me to retract my crazy cat lady comments pictures of yourself dressed as a cat are not the way to do it.
The inside of my nose has felt like the guy's face falling off from raiders of the lost ark all week
She told me the only rule was that I couldn't cum on her Batman blanket.
Found her grinding on my boss with her tongue down her throat last night. Guess who just got promoted!
All I know is I woke up with my apartment door wide open, naked, and I poured an entire bottle of Advil on my bed to sleep in.
So I came to the conclusion that who ever pour my ever clear out saved my life
I woke up wearing nothing but my red thigh high socks and a blue wig. I have no idea what happened.
Randomize
