I'll just stay a virgin forever then
You still have to go anyway
Then I guess I'll have to start sleeping around
Why are you covered in frosting?
Friend's birthday situation turned into enlightened cake orgy.
It's nights like those I refer to my life motto: You can't be just friends with someone after you've seen their genitals.
i can't believe he threw up on you. Well thats what you get for being DD. I used the sombreros as a shield!
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
hurry up this bar wont let me order big pitchers of beer for just myself
We swapped clothes. He left in a v-neck and I left in a tuxedo. Classiest walk of shame or the gayest?
I just rode a horse than walked onto my property in boarshorts, flip flops, and holding a 40. What do I win?
Should I be concerned you put your last name in my phone as "danger"?
Get off me. I'm done. I want a cookie.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
That's not a current picture, because if you look deep enough into my eyes you can still see morals. Not these days.
That was when I yelled "Wisconsin powers activate!" and took off sprinting across the ice
I woke up and found that i was using my computer as a pillow. i had 53 pages of random letters on Microsoft word
It was bad. U were calling my cat "kittiano" and playing her like a piano. Way too drunk my friend.
Sex. Target parking lot. I really am the mayor.
fucked one of the teachers, librarian job's going great
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