so explain again why im purple
no
Facebook is used to stalk your friends, Twitter is used to stalk celebritie=s, and Myspace is used to stalk underaged girls. Everything else is porn. T=he Internet in a nutshell.
You asked him to stand still, you put your leg on his shoulder, started dry humping the air
Well, McDonalds 'escorted' me out after I passed out mid-order
White grape blunt wraps are like the equivalent of a glass of wine in a tux.
Would you feed me pudding while my fake tan dries?
Just did a slip and slide down a five story staircase in my dorm. Being an engineer is fucking awesome
Having a vagina does not stop me from believeing my balls are bigger than yours.
Correct me if I'm wrong, but did you let me pee in the grass while barking? And also, how many of you have videos?
Hostess is going out of business we'll never survive the apocalypse
It'd be easier to list the surfaces my ass hasn't been on.
Nothing says "I Love you" like my dick in a pizza box
I can not believe he edited a picture of our three way and made it his profile picture
If you don't turn up on horseback dressed like a highwayman I am not having sex with you today
Where do you think black out memories go?
Into the dark abysmal abyss of the deepest, darkest part of your mind. It's obviously the bodies natural defense to protect you from witnessing the shit you do while actually blacked out.
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