Never fear I pulled out... she had "lies about taking birth control" written all over her
I hate when my naked walk-arounds are interrupted by someone knocking on the door
Conclusion from last night: Sometimes being classy isn't as fun as making out with a guy on a pooltable in a bar. Happy birthday, Canada.
I just bought a large Pizza and Xanex in the same store...my night is complete
I love how my brain works. It's like being on drugs without the costly upkeep.
I feel like a combination of david goes to the dentist and drunkest guy ever goes for more beer
bought some hannah montana deodorant. hope it doesnt make me smell untalented
i got excepted to unl lol
You mean "accepted".
I had to break up with him he didn't understand my priorities. I'm sorry but Saturday nights are for pot and Doctor Who. I'm not going to change who I am.
Just thought i'd let you guys know that my dad was roofied at a lesbian bar last night...
Stoned in a petco on a Saturday. I figured out that ferrets can eat themselves out. Just picture it. Never leaving.
Update: I may or may not be in a cult
Update #2: I may or may not be the leader of said cult
moms trying to set me up with a 28 year old. hes graduated university like im getting high in my bed and he's an adult
Where is Holly?
Nevermind. i can hear her having sex two doors down
I'm too hungover to Google him and try to save face.
Randomize
