i didnt know what to say other then wrong hole.....after that the moment was ruined.
I woke up to her vacumming the grass
I am currently google image searching dick piercings, trying to see what I'm getting myself into.
I think that's the first time I've heard someone say "this is the safest way of doing things" while holding half a gallon of jagermeister
So I passed out with my boxers on in the hotel jacuzzi at 5am.. The manager who kicked me out was pretty cute so I left my name and number for her at the front desk. I'm giving it a 50/50 she calls.
All i know if I'm throwing uo into a bag with a smiley facE on it right now and this is not a smileuy face time right nowe
No clues in my phone. Only dialed call: my own social security number. And that was before 10:00pm.
I only saw you for about 5 min, but you were rambling about how not even the whiskey could make you fight the skeleton guards.
I don't see how I managed to fuck up so much shit in an hour and a half..
HOW IS IT EARTHLY POSSIBLE TO DO THAT MUCH DAMAGE WITH JUST MY THUMBS?? HOW???
be warned: you might find a baby hampster in my bra
As he was going down on me, I looked over his shoulder and said "ohh a Christian mingle commercial is on"
B. I found a note on my phone and all it says is 'Fuck yeah im a racecar'
i just watched a 27 minute video about owls...that high.
We met behind our asshole boss's back with the intent to oust him from the company. If this revolution is a success, bring nachoes.
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