I attract so much trash. The guy that is engaged and kissed me is here so is his fiancé. I feel likeshw knows and will cut me in the bathroom might happen. If I'm not at the pool tomorrow she has blonde hair and is really flat.
Ed hardy makes air fresheners now. Now even the air can be a douchebag.
I don't care if he acts like a don't exist 6 days a week. On the 7th day he makes makes my vagina cry. In a good way. Jesus understands.
I'd suck anything for a pizza right now
She's lying on the sidewalk wailing that she is gonna die alone, with hundreds of strangers watching us, and also we lost Kate, . Please help me
You're worse than that girl who made out with her cousin at that party
That was you...
All I'm sayin is that I don't want to raise anything. Or deal with anything. Or having anything come out of my vagina. I mean, I don't think that's asking too much.
I don't know what's worse the fact that I woke up with a clit piercing or the fact that I didn't pay for it.
The highlight of the trip was definitely my dad telling me that I "used to be his prettiest daughter."
I woke up at 6 and was laying at the top of my stairs.
Changed all my ex bf's names to "no" in my phone so the next time I try to drunk text one of them it'll basically be like Russian roulette
Being pregnant feels like you have a hangover everyday.. Don't listen to what anyone says about how wonderful it is
Explain to me again why I'm doing the walk of shame if we fucked at my house?
I traded some nice guy at the bar ten bucks and a pack of cigarettes for his leather jacket. I'm pretty sure I win at life. Whoever is in my phone as Tyler Durden, I thank you.
she is currently in the shower drinking a beer and dancing to a song called "the penis song" my roommate is cooler than yours
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