your profile still reads that you like women...interesting? I think there is some photography and video that will show otherwise
It was at that point the crowd that gathered realized i wasn't getting arrested, and passed the sobriety tests. I got a standing ovation from 25 strangers
Amandyke just told me shes gonna make my tongue her cum rag. i'm borderline terrified
i googled "where to have sex in disneyland." i found nothing.
After you puked you called ur mom and told her you fucked on her bed, then u said "Have a good night mommy!" hung up and passed out on my couch
that would explain 17missed calls and 3 very angry voicemails from her
I left you pizza on the porch. I didn't want to wake you, if you were passed out on the bathroom floor again. Sorry if it's cold.
To the genius that put everclear in my humidifier: your time is coming.
I am going to wait until he wakes up to set his couch on fire and then pee it out. That way he knows it was not an accident.
Tommorow.Eggs Benedict and surprise blowjob day
He just kept yelling cup my balls to everyone they kicked us out after 20 min
Fuck I am so excited for the first time I can make someone call me Doctor Nikki during sex after I finish my PhD
I just ate beer and cupcakes for breakfast.... maybe this fourth of july won't be so bad
It's the happiest looking penis I've ever seen. It should have a top hat and a spectacle on and soft shoe across the room with a cane. He's a cheery little feller.
Do you not realize that being Batman fulfills about 95% of my non-sexual fantasies?
He brought me another shot of rum, ice and my underwear when I woke up.
What a gentleman.
I KNOW, right?!
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