Culvers...So Good
So good. The butter burgers slip right outta my ass.
Can we comment on the fact that at five thirty this morning, security woke me up in the hotel lobby, in my underwear, and some random guys winter coat?
She's the only one so far who hasn't laughed at me naked.... I'm gonna marry her.
a price tag just fell out of my vag. i guess its worth $13.99...
I'm being an old woman and getting trashed in a night gown in public...of course it's going to be fun
No, I did not fuck him for football tickets. I fucked him for tickets to the superbowl. I'm not that much of a slut.
Why on earth is he slamming his body into the wall again?
the police told me I had to sign a waiver stating that my car will no longer be used for crime activity.
Dude imagine how many pictures of dicks Obama gets. That can't be unusual. Almost every kids in the US has written the president a letter.
I may have to marry her. She is smarter than me and has a six figure job and doesn't want to have kids. All I have to be is a trophy husband.
Commuter bitches be judging your sister and her bag fulla wine. It's a motherfucking rosé, bitch!
In the last six hours i have procured a free sandwich, watched three movies, and came to orgasm. If that isn't productivity then i don't know what is.
Her hotness level dropped from an 8 to a 2 as soon as I walked into her place. It REEKED of cat piss and there was no litter box and NO CATS.
you left your anal beads in the dishwasher
Lol, yeah it'll be fun,but will it be cereal and dick pics fun?
Randomize
