He said he was from Mississippi and my vagina clamped shut like a frightened oyster
you ever wonder how lesbians feel about girls being in relationships with other girls on facebook? could it annoy them more than it annoys me?
There is a distinct lack of front teeth here.
Just saw a woman walking a golden retriever and a vacuum down the road. I miss downtown.
I don't give a damn about what he wants to do with his life. Personalities are for pussies.
I deleted his number so I had to go into my old voicemails which are saved through my gmail and search his name... Never underestimate the resourcefulness of a drunk girl on a mission for dick
I may hire someone just to sell my family the drugs they keep asking me for. It's cutting into my doing drugs time.
Dude. The only thing that I use less than my dick is my tennis racket. We need to play.
There's cereal in my underwear. Was I in your apartment at any time last night? That's the only logical explanation for this.
If I shaved my pubic hair into a heart for valentine's day how much would you judge me?
I feel you. I woke up butt naked on top of my sheets with a plate of cheese next to my bed...
Im at a south american orphan benefit auction drinking stoli in a coffee mug, this is what my life has become, thanks a lot community college
She said my penis was powerful and magnificent
My ex just brought my grandpa weed. Not sure how I feel about this.
i have a lot of questions about the picture quality/lighting/motion/gravity of the balls...
Randomize
