bathroom sex at kohls isnt as trashy as it seems
We learned a valuable lesson from last night. You can, in fact, order bacon on a Big Mac.
oh fat girl friday strikes again...
You better be watching. There will be a POP quiz. Each correct answer gains you 5 more minutes of the sexual act of your choice
They turned the water off again. Brushed my teeth with whats left from those pitchers of mojitos. So hung over i dont even care.
Dude... there's chunks of hair all over the floor, and no one knows how they got there. You guys just made out right?
I have too much pride to pick his chest hair out of my mouth again
Make this decision based on your love for dick - NOT based on the fact that its probably one of the worst things you've ever thought of doing
I got really upset at the McDonald's worker. They should serve nuggets 24/7. Apparently 5am is breakfast for some people.
The only difference between us and a pack of 14 year old girls is substance abuse
And I might have stolen a bag of Doritos out of Matt's car and hid them in my bag and gave individual chips out to people dancing, trying to convince people they were mini tacos.. Like why Am I allowed to be an adult
Today is a wonderful day to be mildly hungover
You slapped my ass and yelled "HOOTY TOOTY WHAT A BOOTY" in a Schwarzenegger voice
Living alone for four weeks has given me unrealistic expectations of pantslessness.
he broke off the kiss to ask "can I grab your boob?" like props for asking for clear and concise consent but there HAS to be a sexier way to do it
Randomize
