Damn I can't remmbre the last tome I had sobr sex
Um. I believe with my boyfriend, slut
Fuck. Wron person. But yea
Who keeps a bong in their car??
Kids who graduated high school two weeks ago.
Things to remember: Girls don't appreciate it when you yell "Beast Mode!" when switching to doggy style.
I actually had to roll up my long sleeves to masturbate. I hate the winter
I've never seen so many strippers at a funeral...
That's terrible. At least give it a creative name like muff mobile.
He referred to his cock as "The cock" like it was third party or something.
We dropped so many bottles they would only give us plastic cups. We actually drank ourselves back to preschool.
Hey, please tell me that you and dad are having actual steaks tonight and I did not just get sexted by my dad
I just found a piece of squished oatmeal cream pie in my armpit. So very sad.
Its was awkward last year cuz in the middle of it her mom bust In the room with noise makers and champagne
Gotcha. How bad is it?
Well to compare it to something I would say it what's that walls would like inside the primate exhibit at the zoo after a group of monkeys finished throwing feces at each other all afternoon
My 1st STD. I feel like there should be a cake for this.
The adults are the big ones right?
I woke up this morning hand cuffed to the bed with three bruised ribs and Amy written in lipstick on my chest... what happen lastnite??
Randomize
