how is it that boston is so bitchin and the rest of massachusetts sucks so much?
how is it that you still think "bitchin" is an acceptable term anymore?
he refuses to go down on me anymore when he's high because he thinks my clit piercing stares at him
It's 10am, I'm at grocery store buying booze b/c the bf just told me that he didn't "technically" break up with his ex.
you ever feel like there is a sober person insided you pointing and laughing....?
No I remember falling down the stairs I just don't remember it hurting.
I am planning my day around naps and lesbians.
The idea of snorting emergen-c actually just crossed my mind.
I gave him head and we watched Fashion Police. somehow it wasn't awkard.
We've completely outdone ourselves. We packaged a collective total of six grams of pot and salvia into little bowl-sized tinfoil capsules. It's totally impossible to tell which is which without comparing, every Friday from now on we pick one out and see what the fuck happens
The way I see it, everyone on campus has a fake, but I'm the only person who actually makes beer in their dorm.
and ive been naked for the greater part of the evening. alone, drunk, and naked. i think that is how all great interventions start.
They shoved things up my nose I feel violated
Yeah she's a complete bitch. But I mostly hate her because she hijacked my fuck buddy.
Apparently I showed all your grooms men my vagina to prove I did not have underwear on. Awesome
The kid with the ed hardy shirt put a bunch of random shit in the washer and turned it on. example: a hanger, the movie Chocolate with Johnny Depp, and your mom's cat
Randomize
