weak ass sauce last night. waste of time. you suck. ps. your boobs are fake
she said if she won the lottery she'd fuck me... isn't that like government funded prostitution?
My own mom unfriended me on Facebook.
...and all my boxers are outside in the snow because????
Good point, clearly my love of penis contributed to my torn knee ligament.
Jacob lost his virginity in a threesome. I am deffs fucking this kid.
DURING A THUNDERSTORM ON HIS BIRTHDAY.
I just got head while watching air force one. Harrison ford would be proud.
I feel I must have sex with him first to fully decide where my vagina belongs.
I wish I could have seen the drive thru woman's face after " May I please have 20 Mcflurrys.....and a large diet coke, I'm trying to watch my weight for bikini season."
there may have been a blood oath never to speak of it again...only reason i can think of as to why there was a 1 inch bloody cut on my right boob
is it wrong to hook up with someone at a memorial drum circle
We took vodka shots. You kept saying it was the key to your heart.
I think I'll shower sitting down. That seems safe.
At some point i am going to say to you "i have this really bad idea! You in? " just go with it.
I'm listening to a women in metal station and wearing a flannel. I may have approached peak lesbian.
Randomize
