i don't have fun when you have fun. i have embarrassment, fear, and significantly less cash in my wallet.
There's a difference between southern and inbred. She just doesn't know that yet.
throwing up in the shower isnt as glamorous as i expected
since when the fuck is that glamorous?
the outcome of this sandwich determines whether or not i do anything else with my day..
Hurry up and get here I'm judging myself
I'm sick of being the only unemployed member of the group. Doing things alone isn't partying. Its sad.
Someone asked me what I was drinking, I was drinking rum, but I was also eating starbursts so i told them "daiquiris"
Also I feel that I would be a hell of a sled dog operator.
I've been asked to reupholster their slam-couch so I found some off-cuts of medical-grade, hermetically sealed fabric. She'll be slammed upon for generations to come.
Thats alot of pressure.
Just on your vagina. BTW I'm passing your house.
this could be the second dad I've smoked weed with
I DESERVE A BEADED TATTOOED MAN I'VE WANTED ONE FOR SO LONG
BEARDED TATTOOED MEN ARE PEOPLE AND NOT THINGS TO BE GIVEN FREELY
They found you popping and locking it alone in the parking lot
He tripped and fell all the way to the ground and then stood right back with out spilling a drop of his 3/4 full glass of rum and coke. It was like watching something from the matrix
The cat hopped on my bed and watched me masturbate naked with a vibrator. I've never felt more sorry in my entire life
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