I just left during the middle of Chemistry to go throw up in the bathroom....and you laughed at my travel toothbrush.
Another weekend, another 3 guys I have to awkwardly avoid while crossing campus...
I just drank Colt45 out of a champagne glass. I feel classy.
Colt 45 out of anything is classy.
This girl has a second refrigerator that she uses JUST for liquor, her kitchen chairs are kegs AND she can grill. I'm not coming back.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Working out to an exercise video on OnDemand. Also, drinking beer and eating cream cheese with a side of bagel in between stretches.
You seemed more interested in the queso dip than you were in the hand job
youre not allowed to be friends with girls ive double teamed. period.
It's fine...I've done worse things to better people.
You called me to pick you up from the bar at 9:00. When we drove over the speed bumps you put your hands in the air and pretended you were on a roller coaster.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Sorry I couldn't reference you in my facebook quote. I will redirect any likes and comments straight to my blowjob efforts this week.
Your feet probs hurt bc the cab driver kicked us out a mile from home after you wouldn't stop screaming "prohibition can suck my dick"
He sent me a pic stitch collage of all the tit pics I had sexted him this month. It was so sweet!
We were walking to the bar with a group of people and literally made 4 stops in people's lawns garages or random walls for him to eat me out
If I ever write a memoir I'm thinking "Choosing to sit in a vat of shit" would fit
Planning a vacation around my dog. I have become one of those dog moms.
Randomize