i cant be the least bit upset about his new gf cause all i think is that she has to put things in his ass
FIrst one done
How did it go?
I dunno I taled about women being treated wrong and quoted Ice T. So probably a "c"
Leave it to him to get us kicked out of a bar for hitting on an 80 year old woman. I want to be that wasted one day.
The guy I wanted to make out with just got beat up, let's roll.
How many times do I have to drunk reject you for our friendship to become awkward? Cause were at 9 as of last night
...And then you kept screaming "cock mouth" in her face every time she tried to talk.
we're stoned watching those roller coaster simulators w our hands up screaming on our couch
Hey it happens. Think of it this way- you didn't wake up in jail, your face wasn't inexplicably busted and you still have all your teeth. In this group of friends, you're on top!
He pulled a condom out of his satchel and i questioned my entire life.
Then you jumped in the pool because your were convinced the scratches on your neck from the cat were gills and you could breathe underwater.
Btw he dated my mom. You're Eskimo siblings with my mom. Good job.
Cuz I feel like I ate the whole candy isle at 7/11 last night and chased it with rum
You pretty much did tho
Nothing like a little " am I gonna shit myself " to spice up the work day
What part of the grouping of the words "anal beads" confuses you?
Any who, I expect to be showered with roses apon my arrival
How about beer and nachos?
A fine substitute!
Randomize
