Shitting during a conference call is so empowering.
Yeah I'm pretty much like lane on gilmore girls except my mom doesn't look so mean all the time.
The Swedes wanted a tensome.
Should you consider yourself out of control when everyone at the party is cheering you on while you're puking, and on the last heave you act like you're rolling dice right before the finale???
Someone just took a shot from my crotch. I should not have to drive home
She just threw the soap bottle at me from the ladie's room and keeps asking me when we left the bar and got on the boat.
He ate me out. IN THE MORNING. I love less attractive men.
They should really start adding the average cost of day drinking to our cost analysis sheets. Does FAFSA cover this? No. It doesn't.
Dude, he threw a pool chair off of an 8 story building. It was a successful night I'd say.
Virginity is like the pottery barn-you break it, you bought it.
Thanks....I've always wanted my vagina compared to an overpriced coffee table
It was like something out of a fucked up fairy tale. He just crowdsurfed over to her while riding a keg, said "come sail with me", and then the crowd carried them off into the night. What.
If it wasn't for the fact that I drink during my lunch break I'm pretty sure I would have quit this job by now
Whatever. I have his dick. Haha how many girls can say they have a dildo replica of a guy they were seeing
2017 is gonna be explosive... Already watching fireworks out the window while shit my brains out. Happy Ew Year
The adults are the big ones right?
Randomize
