You can tell alot about a person by their poo.. For example, he was a smoker.
the only good thing about these hospital visits are the free pregnancy tests
Just found a picture of a hobo making out with her tits...a HOBO
Remember when you tried to pay that stripper to cry on stage?
Its official. I've reentered slutty territory. I was a condom away from having sex in a childs playhouse at a park. Oh and I lost my car keys.
We still going to Happy Hour
Idk. I can't because it doesn't fit in my schedule of sleeping or throwing up
It was an 11am booty call. We were both out of our element.
Im deleting that text because its a possible ncaa violation
Come my child we shall walk thru the pasture of amazing sex and corndogs. Hint:some corndogs are not corndogs.
she broke up with me the week she got divorced. maybe I should grab a beer with her ex
Don't ever feel guilty about what you put in your mouth best advice my gma ever gave me lmao
Her hookup left his underwear and shorts in the dorm last night... What he was wearing when he left, we may never know.
She tried doing a backflip and ended up doing somersaults down the entire stair case.
sexting just seems like too much work right now.
I fucked his roommate. And that roommate's best friend. And my roommate. And my roommate's old roommate.
i'm bowing down, but slow your roll.
Randomize
