You're completely useless in the revolution.
I didn't talk to you tonight because I've decided you look like a man.
Its about time the women of america have a president they can masturbate to again
I just counted my steps so I know when you start looking for you on my way back from the bathroom
You know how us drunks love counting steps
how soon is too soon after the break-up to ask for my condoms back?
the guy next to me needed a pen, so I let him take one from my book bag. my panties are now being passed around the class...thank you for telling me you hid them in my bookbag.
6 other girls and I took an ice cream truck to the bar when we couldn't get a cab. Best birthday ever.
Yeah I'm gunna date him. I figure its regular sex and maybe feelings will come in time...it worked for arranged marriages...
Sweetie, don't go home with him. You can do so much better. Everyone else at the bar agrees.
he told me to hold it and try to write my name in the snow and it seemed like a bonding moment because neither one of us had ever done that before. i didn't anticipate it vibrating and weirding me out therefore making me let go and get my hand peed on.
i'd say i'm about at weeping-uncontrollably-in-a-puddle-of-my-own-tears-and-urine level
I threw up outside of a cab while waiting in a drive thru Mexican line while others who i don't know watched from their cars while they ate. Dinner and a show.
At my place... I'm gonna be honest though stonewall Jackson is not going to be able to rally the troops. Too many shots of tequila
I was in the rappers prayer circle. Then they're blunt circle
I've scurried myself in your trunk come find me in the morning
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