when does round two start
I don't know, I gave up bartenders for lent
yes, the chronicles of narnia is exactly what happens when you do crack inside of a wardrobe.
I woke up at 3am naked and stroking a watermelon.
FYI I'm about to upload a vid of you to facebook of you screaming "SNACK ATTACK" and throwing cheetos at everyone playing pong...
No amount of marijuana is enough to justify blood on my ceiling
Have you resumed life with the rest of the world yet or are you still huddled in the fetal position while wearing compression gear?
It feels like there's puke trying to explode out of me from behind my eyeballs.
I just want to eat and sleep til I'm dead. I should've been born a cat.
You left a motherfucking bruise. ON MY TIT. How? How do you even. No.
She made me walk a straight line to prove i was sober enough to help carry you to the car
Knowing you it was perfect out of spite. Like. A line straighter than YOU
Not even official and he's cleaned my puke twice. His hotdog skills are an added bonus. I've got a keeper
I got propositioned to get involved with an engaged couple. I told them I didn't think my married couple would like me to see other couples...
How is it possible for someone who gets so many dick picks sent to her, to be experiencing such a complete and utter lack of dick IRL.
Far be it from me to tell you where you store your dildos but from an interior decorating standpoint not fucking there
We need to catch up immediately. I took ecstasy and made out with carrot face this weekend.
Randomize
