Dude i dont know how people can complain that waterboarding is such a bad thing. I just sat through a fucking puddle of mudd show. Now thats torture
how could I be having a bad time, I have the three most important things in life: Goat cheese, Xanax, and Saved By the Bell Re-runs.
I love being friends with rich people. I get laid by association.
she's like bobby knight all she does is scream and point
the pic of her and her boyfriend fell off the wall as we were fucking.
I'm functioning at the level of a challenged walrus.
you're the one asking for my vibrator at 4 in the morning so reconsider your life
Everything is just really out of control. I hear puking from three different parts of the house. Roger has black eye from being punched. Kaiser tried shaving his head, but somehow burned himself. Music is bumping, but everyone is either puking and calling out for help or blacked the fuck out.
Also, lets remember that we have known each other for nearly a decade and our two most recent photos to one another are boxes of plan b
who has a one night stand on Christmas ? But he's pretty attractive so thumbs up
LMAO I like how "don't worry I'll bring chasers" is your way of assuring things will be ok
I just realized that Margarita Wednesdays are so much better now when followed by No Work Thursdays.
He just kept pissing on the couch as we were yelling at him while he repeatedly told us "its going to be okay".
Last night I recall my hair going up in flames. This is evident by the burnt hair smell that is following me around this morning
I just bought two cartons of ice cream, 5 boxes of mac and cheese and a bridal magazine. Don't judge me.
Randomize
