Dude I wish you were here. I'm innthe back seat and it looks like outer space and everything feels like rice. idk. wtf.
the bouncer kept askin you for id just to see how long it would take you to find your pants
he woke me up at 3 am to ask me where my plunger, a towel, and staples were. i'm afraid to go into my bathroom.
Always fun waking up to 911 as your last dialed call.
I don't want to talk. I just want to motorboat those tits
That's right. If she can't abide by the rules then she gets booted. It's like survivor booty call edition
Also I spent like 2 hours on the hubble/nasa website sunday night looking at pictures of outer space and cried my face off at how beautiful and complex it is. What's wrong with me?!
He can spot Burberry from half a bar away. He's not into vag
He sent me a snap chat of his naked torso with cookies over his nipples. Like.... that does not make me want you homeboy.
Body shots with my MILFs MILF!!
All I did was send my mom an ecard
I actually just took 17 pictures of some guy at the gas station that needs to marry me now
I don't know where I'm at. But I'm pretty sure what I'm looking at is a small bear.
she's my really slutty friend i bring around so i can act slutty and not feel as bad about it
So I think my neighbor's name is Olli if I'm hearing the girl the girl he's fucking clearly
I'm at work behind the bar and just washed my mouth out with rumple bc I don't have a toothbrush. This may be a new low.
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