careful when you do the walk of shame, they are handing out bibles on campus
We will have to stop frequently for food, stretching legs, interesting things on the side of the road, and sex. So you might as well eat.
He asked me if I "almost moaned"
I'm pre-party power houring. It's so catchy I couldn't not do it
I just got kidnapped by the rugby team for a scavenger hunt. I'm "the girl you had sex with last night"
I just had a full choir singing the phrase pudding cup in my head. Too. Stoned.
Walked back to my room from the bus last night and all I see is 3 of my friends on the porch chugging whiskey and then throwing up in unison
You shouldn't do laundry high cus pink.
trying to figure out what happened last night by looking around the apartment.
naked man under the piano. THE PLOT THICKENS.
My taste buds are fucked up, everything tastes like fire after last night.
the fact that i came three times was completely negated by the fact that he high-fived himself after.
THE SUPER HOT BARTENDER WHO LOOKS LIKE RYAN GOSLING JUST WALKED IN. BUT HE DOESNT EVEN WALK HE GLIDES. LIKE AN ANGEL.
Your grandma changed her Netflix password :(
I'm sitting in Madison square park surrounded by children thanking god I took emergency contraception
Ahha guy saw me buying beer, went "hmmmmm" and nodded his head approvingly. No words exchanged, but he has made his way to my heart haha
Randomize