sorry we overslept. have a good day at work. p.s. thanks for making it feel like my vagina got hit by a train.
Well, I'm eating cake, watching wedding videos of people I don't know, and crying. Clearly I'm a vision of mental health today
I have no idea. Next thing I know we're all down on one knee saying the pledge of allegiance and then singing I'm Proud to be an American. Then Trevor ate pizza off the sidewalk.
I always give him head in random places, it's a guessing game for his cock.
Hahahaha you would not believe what I just pulled out of my vagina. Actually you probably wouldn't be surprised.
Those foam number one hands, are the BEST socks.
We are going to get clementines. And shoot them out of a ballon launcher. That's after we come up to the ivy with a bullhorn and reck havoc. Where are you.
I am stoned and listening to the Olympics music I downloaded on Saturday. Best 6 dollars I have ever spent.
Because you work where i will be drunk tonight I'm asking you. Is a shirt required on Halloween?
I will be single by the day my lease is up (234 days). Plan accordingly.
A guy with a mustache poured a beer down your throat while you had a crippled boy named Sunshine riding your back
To be clear you just said "I'll give you a baby" as a sext?
Dude. All I know is that I woke up on the floor with two naked chicks who don't speak English.
Clutch
I love you. You know I enjoy the constant sex noises
ALL I WANT IN MY MOUTH IS A GLORIOUS COCK SMOTHERED IN CHOCOLATE. DICK AND CHOCOLATE; IS IT TOO MUCH FOR A GIRL TO ASK FOR?!
Randomize
