u on campus? she just peed the bed i need to go
my penis was classy and tasteful, i don't know what her problem was.
My penis is bigger than his and I don't even have a penis.
i have received so many congratulations texts this morning. sleeping with him really was a good decision.
we seriously had to hang a plastic bag on his ears so he could throw up right into it.
Missing a small section of hand. Hope your night is going better
pouring popcorn down my shirt before we went to the bar was the best idea ever. it was delicious and convenient.
Either I need to stop bringing you back to my apt or I need to stop buying ikea furniture
We found you naked curled up in a ball in the closet, using a gorilla suit as a blanket
I'm so happy I'm only on my second drink. That would have been the best idea ever if I was on my fifth.
So this is where people who peaked in high school come to drink?
I'm drinking and working out! I'm bench pressing the beer pong table and doing push ups and lifting the chair.
I have a boner in one of my pics with her which no one noticed.
Honestly the prospect of dick really lifts a girl's spirits
I've never been so excited to be bleeding from my vagina.
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