I wanna put my baby in that!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!
Ew you even made it your fb status
Ppl probably think ur having a kid
I hope
Love having children with random chicks
I told my rommate that he was pissing on his bed. He said "ok man" and took a step backwards and continued. He then went back to bed.
When I came home you were watching infomercials, eating croutons out of the box and salsa from a funnel. Well done.
We're not too concerned with getting her out of jail. We're on a mission for donuts.
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i wish the dell website had a "did you drink an entire bottle of rum and stepped on your laptop which shattered the screen this weekend and would like to know how to fix it without your parents finding out FAST?" link on their homepage.. i can't be the only one
like the only thing i remember is bringing a piece of toast to the bar...
It's like he's trying to get head in every car except his.
After he finished his girlfriend called him. I sat there, tied his shoes for him, then he high fived me and said "this is gonna be a great summer steph"
Me. blonde. Sex. Dance floor.
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We left the bar and you kept yelling "ONWARD SCION, TO GLORY!!"
Good morning love! Friendly reminder that we decided to make leggings with a vagina zipper. "For the winter quickie"
I need vodka mixed w a bit of holy water right now
How ya feelin' champ?
Like a million bucks that was soaked in alcohol.
Hurry I'm alone dressed like a prostitute eating French fries.
I have hit the ultimate fuck buddy status. We pulled over in a construction zone to have a quickie.
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