Apparently I called 911 everytime Sean Kingston told me to
It was one of those "since we're naked anyway" type situations
Fuck buddy has no power. Invited her over to use my shower. I love hurricaines.
there was some random girl that nobody really knew, standing in the corner trying to shave her armpits with a plastic butter knife.
You're barking up the wrong lesbian.
He played a tape of his mad rapping skills after the final...his rapper name was Mad Stylz and he rapped about all the pussy he got in the 90's. I love Sociology.
How would u feel about transportimg a penis shaped ice luge to nashville?
Seriously, it sounds like someone is torturing a dozen cats inside a Japanese techno club while a jamaican yells random hipster words through a megaphone.
I just stuck my fingers down her throat so she could puke. I mean what are friends for
Oh my god she just threw up on her dog
At one point I was waiting in line for the port o potties and a storm trooper came out of one and sprayed me in the face with a water gun
Like that actually happened I wasn't hallucinating
After the Jell-o shots and about 6 shots of lighter fluid brand tequila, it got to the point where breathing was painful. All I could do was pray I didn't fall asleep in the front yard.
Wearing the same clothes for three days in a row and eating an entire two pound bag of jelly beans really has a way of making a person rethink their life...
I came on her face and asked if she wanted fries with that. Currently driving to McDonald's.
It's something you'd find in the room outside of Ben Carson's sex dungeon
WELL I DIDNT KNOW IT WAS POSSIBLE TO COME SO HARD YOU HAVE AN ASTHMA ATTACK BUT HERE I AM
Randomize
