I tried making the sex a little better this time so right before I blew I yelled "ready or not here I come!"
Suck a a big bag of reindeer cock bud. Sent from church. See you in hell
The visine ive been using for four yrs expired. in sept. of 2001.....i will never question my eye problems again.
a cabby told me that vodka is the coors light of liquor, and then gave me his number
Great. My funeral dress now smells of smoke and disappointing sex.
We're at the hospital. She got a head rush and fell and now blood everywhere. Smoke the rest, just save her a bowl
are you still mad that doritos made their way into my sex life
.....a litte
The best of us have puked in our office garbage cans. I just hope yours wasn't the metal mesh kind...and bagless like mine. Rock n roll office manager.
First sex of the summer I'm winning 1-0
GET HOME NOW
Oh shit
I'm about to be a GTA V widow, he could at least throw me a bone. Literally.
I woke up with my vibrator in my bed so I'm assuming I had a decent night.
Burnt food and a broken vibrator. Disappointment after disappointment. Is April a man?
I guess you know it was a good night when you find your ripped underwear in your pocket, and a nerf bullet falls out of your pant leg 😂😂
Finally finished unpacking shit from school n found a bra with no idea whose it is... I miss college so much it hurts sometimes
This night could easily degenerate into a drunken haze of strippers and gambling, but I need a support network.
Randomize
