a guy named alex was hitting on my friend tonight. he doesnt work on wind turbines tho.
I thought she was going to get passionate and throw her on the bed and fuck her, but she just started breaking stuff.
That's the thing about women.
You were rubbing your foot on one of your legs and kept saying, "My sock feels like a waterslide!"
If I go there, please come with. It will accelerate the lesbian rumor but be totally worth it.
I think she was eating a cup of ramen noodles while we banged, or had a seizure
Going to.goingto.gtoing to DIE DIE DIEEEE......i feel like everyeone impotrant in my life like MLK is judging me.... saddd day
I owe you a thank you for last night. Only you could go up to a guy, ask if he likes my boobs, and return later to find us in a full on dance floor makeout sesh. Well played.
That bar is one yeast infection away from total annihilation.
I wasn't a groupie because I didn't carry his guitar home
So this is where people who peaked in high school come to drink?
im on the hungover til tuesday pabst blue ribbon diet
I left her alone for a few minutes and she's already using a guy on his hands and knees as a chair while another guy is serving her margaritas.
Shit facedness and cuddling are what you have to look forward to this evening.
As much as I hate to admit it, some day ill need a man because I can't open jars myself and you can't 69 a dildo
Like I don't even know how to respond to this?
Eventually the conversation shifted (as it always does) to Sex toys.
Randomize
