is it wrong to smoke out middle schoolers?
yes...dear jesus what did you do?
bwahaha. ask your little brother in about 20 minutes. im dropping him off.
look mate, i'm pretty sure 14 texts saying "fuck me. fuck me now" more than passes the legal benchmark for consent.
i knew it was going to be a good night when i was bleeding, licked it and it tasted like miller light
All I remember is yelling RUN as fireworks started going off in the kitchen. Who said that was a bad idea?
You remember those guys we called the police on after they stole our keg? Turns out one of them is a student instructor in one of my classes. Figuring out how best to use this information.
i can recognize that vagina from a mile away
That would warm my breasts.
In this context breast is a metaphor for soul.
When he gets asked "is it in?" more than his name you arent missing out on much more than a petite tampon.
You're on Grindr at the STD clinic. I love you.
I just made a drink so ill shit. It's goona be great. Ill tell you about it when you get here. Get pumped. For my shit.
Btw kudos to your tongue last night. Sorry about that lady jizz in your beard.
Meanwhile I'm working a fucking flute workshop and I'm one high c away from shoving a flute up the asshole of the next passerby
how come you came home with "Amanda owns this" written on your forhead
Girl i am always here for you. But i am going to have sex now so im going to call you in the morning.
Unless my dick prospects improve this year’s Halloween costume will include panties with “DTF” written on them and a push up bra
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