3:40 am: you never wrote back on my facebook wall
it was average length and chubby
so kinda like him?
now i'm wondering if all guys are shaped like their penis...
it will be a sad day when drinking racks of keystone isnt socially acceptable anymore
For his 21st I'm getting a fancy hotel that way he can at least sleep in a nice bathtub
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
i just made mint juleps with bourbon and fresh breath strips. i am the macgyver of alcohol.
Excuse me by sucking dick i am fighting crime. Just think of all the prostitues going out of business and getting real jobs.
you humped every kiosk in the store. then you asked for an application.
sorry for throwing an entire water bottle of vodka at you. It was very wasteful
We crashed a rave, threw glitter all over Gay Dan and the bartender, broke a chandelier and called ourselves the Kings of Neon.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
She sucks. And I almost hooked up with a clown last night
Well he can play the xylophone with his erect cock... So he's got that going for him
I can't feel my tongue. And that means go. Green means go. And you know what Barney says. Green means go and woah means no. DRIIIIINKK
shes making a cheerios necklace using dental floss 'just in case' she gets the munchies later
All I see when I think of you are dancing penis angels around your head.
And I don't know if this is really ESP, or just a crazy feeling, but I'm pretty sure he has an std. Or at least a cold.
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