Why didn't you tell me that Dad was a registered sex offender?
We were going to tell you eventually, how'd you find out?
Our school resource officer showed us how to use Family Watchdog and pulled up his picture.
The cops found weed in michael jacksons house today...it makes up for the child molesting, I like him more now.
So i've def seen the girl running for student body VP getting fingered in a bar.
i jus got home and totaly forgot i had nut all over the back of my shirt
..im mad u rememberd about that
She came over with Guinness cupcakes, a case of Mickeys, wearing an Ireland flag & nothing else.
i knew you were okay when you wanted to eat in the ambulance
The instructions say refer to specific course material, but I'm in no mood to reopen this awful book that caused me so many lost hours of drinking.
Yeah FUCK THAT NOISE
I should become a firefighter. Who uses his cock to fight fires. Like a Superhero.
Give me 20 minutes.. I'm going to need to start off with an orgasm to get through this day
I'm just concerned as to why his penis is two different colors.
we had sex in his office so i figured it was appropriate to like his company's page on facebook
Listening to sad Lana Del Rey songs together is an integral part of the lesbian bonding process
It was rocky mountain showdown of course we got shitfaced and talked about eating buffaloes
If he has a beard, chances are, that’s an open invitation to sit on his face
I was sitting down, taking a piss with a boner, her cat walked into the bathroom and walked up to my legs, I sneezed and pissed all over her cat through between the toilet seat and bowl, it ran off screeching. She thought I peed on her cat on purpose. Kicked me out
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