school has made you so classy.
that's mcgill. producing sluts since 1884.
Peanut butter while high is kinda stressful
Dude. Apparently I just smoked some stuff that's used for Nigerian spirit quests.
to whom it may concern. if i am dead in colleens bed it is not her fault i slept in my scarf. my dads middle name is ronald.
Are taco bell cups microwave safe? I can't make that judgement right now
there is vodka in my soul right now. The vapor is coming out my nose.
Hi. This might be awkward, but I met you on saturday at about 330 am. I have to admit I don't remember your name, what we talked about, or various details of how I got home. What I do remember is that I was invested enough in getting your number to ask my cab driver for a pen to write it down since my phone was dead. So do you want to meet, soberer, some time?
Hey bro I think you got the wrong number I'm a dude
She literally just changed his birthday. Overly attached girlfriend has nothing on her.
My apartment smells like a lavender field inside of a giant bong.
We smoked bowls and watched Cops for what seemed like hours. And yet I know I'll go back.
Can I tell you that I just incorporated the spice girls in my sexting and you not judge me
I am the only person I know ever to have been brought TO the bar in the back of a cop a car. Twice.
Now i know i wasnt that drunk... So why are there texts of me volunteering for a nude photo shoot for an art major student?
she threw up on her exam, awkwardly wiped it off with her sleeve and continued writing.
Like sometimes I’ll be hangry but for dick
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