I swear coke makes your nose hairs grow out of control
shes got a really nice body. but her face is eh.
you dont need a face to have sex
On this egg donor form, it asks "In the past 5 years, have you had sex for drugs or money?" It only gives a yes or no option and no place to explain myself. What do I do?
Vodka is such a love hate relationship.
Truer words have never been spoken.
Or I die of a heart attack, which is the more likely/less fun scenario.
Sudue. BIG CUP LOTS OF NOMNOMD TUOSPY
you covered his dog in toothpaste. safe to say hes not gonna call you.
theres a wall by my room thats like, a prime fucking wall. before i move out SOMEBODY is gonna fuck me on that wall, goddamnit.
She thought that based on the way she feels that she got drugged last night, but come on, her turn on word is hello, who needs to drug that??
You picked a jagger girl up claimed her then walked out the door with her that was the last we saw of you
They told you that you couldn't fit in the dryer. Man, did they eat their words. You did brake the door though.
when seducing a hipster, do you think taking a nude pic on a lomo-camera app would increase my chances? grainy off-colored boobs and telling him how much i like reading salinger?
If you don't let me come over I'm gonna call you on speaker and you have to listen to her scream and moan too
Okay first of all, that is a sick ass nickname please call me that forever. Second, i need your help.
Just hit on a girl with the line, "You look like Natalie Portman if she did drugs". Strike 1
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