She wanted to test if her costume allows her to still have sex in it. It does
Dating my ex's drug dealer.. best. revenge. ever.
I just watched a blind kid buy from one of the vending machines on campus...guess there's nothing like a good surprise?
He kept yelling "osteoporosis" and threw milk at her because she broke her arm.
Thank you for the breast cancer awareness themed circle of death. Had it been any other time I would not have played topless.
We tried to get a ride from the same firefigters that were turning off the fire alarm going off at our house.
This is what happens when you live with someone you met on Grindr
If you ever wanna get tagged teamed, army guys are pretty open to it. Write that down for future reference.
I miss yesterday.Today's hangover makes yesterday's look like a little girl with blonde ringlets playing hopscotch in the street with a ginger kitten.
Is posting a pic on insta of my previously dyed blue pubes socially acceptable?
Just hooked up my fuck buddy with a job working for my dad...this can only end bad.
My husband was abducted by a group of disco dancers in the parde and danced off down the street. If you see him, tell him to Hustle on home and clean the cat box. #MardiGras
That cat I follow on Facebook beat cancer so we're drinking tonight in celebration
I once took a shot of lighter fluid.. That's not a secret just a fucked up story
Lol it's kinda hilarious. I left missing one glass... guage. I feel like Cinderella... but less classy.
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