Is that you in the white hat?
Fine suit yourself
Maybe she gives good head
A girl who still calls a dick a "wiener"cannot possibly give good head
I am currently prioritizing my hw by splitting into things i can and things i cant do drunk. Oh college
And then he asked me why the subtitles were in Arabic. The television was off.
We started making out, then he decided to get naked, put on a condom, and proceed to dry hump my leg, sweat pants and all, until he blew his load. I thought this was college. I immediatly left claiming I can't sleep in other people's rooms. He didn't even bother taking off my hoodie.
This girl brought half a watermelon to class. I want to be on her level.
You're not supposed to support this behaviour, btw the judge recognized me
too late I already started a fight with someone named luscious
What part of don't open in front of your kids didn't you understand? Astroglide, magnums, fuzzy handcuffs and a blindfold are going to be hard to explain as friends presents.
party devolved into two exes battling with Cal's tiki torches, and the lawn being set on fire kinda sorta and then we all hula'ed... hulaed?
I was blacked out when we met, so basically this will be a blind date.
I apparently got up in the middle of the night after fucking him and started looking for you under piles of his clothing
i just teared up watching channing tatum in drag emerge from the fog on lip sync battle. it's gotta be PMS. either that or something is realllllly wrong with me.
I traded some nice guy at the bar ten bucks and a pack of cigarettes for his leather jacket. I'm pretty sure I win at life. Whoever is in my phone as Tyler Durden, I thank you.
Whatever douche. I sucked the dick that made you. I. Win.
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