Mel Gibson is dating a 24 year old
You're not Mel Gibson and I'm not 24.
help me. he won't leave me alone. he just licked my ear and he's so drunk. get him off me. we're in the closet. help.
Lets evaluate? U kissed one boss and lef twith another man. I cock teased the other, hardcore had a tongue jammed down my throat, made out w aa third then left in a cab w alex w them all yelling at me and offering rides. My cheek was also licked and bitten by 2 other men and we almost made out (u and me) because they asked. were hired.
what if every blade of grass was a penis?
i have rugburns grass stains and some road rash. im an all terrain slut
I know it should be off bounds, but can this be the chick we all sleep with at some point? I can write it off as drunken mistake, you all just have to come up with equally good excuses
whoever set the energy saving light timer in the lobby bathroom cleraly has no concept how long a work dump takes
Her mom walked into the garage as we were smoking a kush blunt with sombreros on.
When we were done making out, some guy ran into the room yelling, "I'll save you Brandon! I'll save you!"
I've got beer and a bag of saltwater taffy and croutons, is that enough for this typhoon thing?
I wish I could remember her name, I mean we fucked and all, but it woulda been nice to tag her in the instagram pics.
The dicks good but it's not two trains and a bus good.
Never drinking before a 6am train again. Just threw up at boarder control and had to pretend it was cause I was pregnant and not cause I trashed.
You make Europe seem so glamorous.
There's a little game I've come up with since the mess of a party I had; it's called "tinsel or condom wrapper? (or: what's that on the floor?)"
Well, if you do die, I'll bedazzle your coffin.
Randomize
