i have nine cents in my fucking bank account... not even a dime
I can handle NPR. I speak hippie. I took it in college.
you know what its like when everyone is chanting "do it, do it"...still friends?
Puked in my laptop case in the middle of my nutrition class.
You're doing that 'overestimating how much I care' thing again.
By the power invested in me, I now pronounce your taco to be meaty. Meaty taco meaty taco meaty meaty meaty taco.
Don't worry. I told him just because you've gargled some balls in the past doesn't mean you'll be handling his.
I really wanted that to be shared. Thank you.
The gay is strong with you! You're more concerned about my outfit than my safety.
if drunk means calling me and asking to borrow the game of life at 2am then I think you were drunk
okay. well, yeah. i'm a mess and a half. this shit is not what dumbledore died for.
Random question: Have you ever woken up and were suprised to not have a penis?
I'm actually kinda upset that we didn't consider velcro-ing detachable capes to our clothes before this moment.
You are cordially invited to the annual finals week stress relief drinking binge at our manor this evening
I assure you, it was not a Porn Hub Bee Movie parody.
Dude I love you. So much. Thank u. I'm safea. In allysi lns car. Mine towed. If u loved me ud leand me 500 in the morning. Sleep on it nd let me know.
Randomize
