i just pissed myself at work. maybe they'll buy the old coffee spill trick
he whispered in my ear that he would be upstairs and i should come up. i stayed downstairs. he came back down and repeated to whisper in my ear. this happened about 5 times until he passed out.
it's like there's an entire ecosystem in your vagina.
so when am I gonna get some from you?
when you dick grows 3 inches
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were talking about masturbation in my pysc class. He says it's healthy. I'm gonna live forever
I wish they had a "No Yankees" filter on status updates.
WHATEVER CLASS IS PLAYING "TOOT IT AND BOOT IT" AT 8:30 IN THE MORNING, I WANT IN.
It was honestly like he was directing a porno or something. he kept telling different people to grab other people's boobs, it was all very artistic.
I think if it were a part of everyone's daily routine, the world would be happier. International Finger Yourself While Bathing Day.
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the tv said "its small, its comfortable..." and i started laughing... safe to say he lost any dignity he had left...
Get your penis over here NOW. emergency
I'm on this new diet called "I have 10$ till next Friday, I have rice
A place where it's acceptable to show body parts is not a good place for me to be.
I told him I was going to sit on his face after I got out of the shower, he threw up the arm boners and yelled "STEVE HOLT!!" I might actually stop sleeping with other dudes.
Business idea: assless chaps for toddlers. I'm high.